Due to yet another recent heartbreak, which occurred at the end of last year – I have decided to take a yearlong – if not longer – hiatus from dating – and re-evaluate my romantic “career.” By doing so – I intend to find out exactly why all of my relationships end up over – and precisely what it is that I am doing wrong.

For me to sit here and say that every woman I have ever dated did something wrong, which is why we are apart, would be chauvinistic and arrogant. In other words – they can’t all be wrong – and it can’t all be their fault. So, in order to achieve this – I literally interviewed five of my previous girlfriends – including my most recent – to find out exactly why it is that with every relationship I have – I go from a loved boyfriend into a friend of a former lover.

I must say that I am in a very unique position that most men are not. I am friends with most of my ex-girlfriends to this day. Whether we dated ten years ago – or even a few months ago – I still hear from them on an almost daily basis. So that said – I contacted them before writing this column and asked them why we are now just friends and no longer lovers.

After the “interview” – the answers were the following:

· I am romantically “the same” with every girl I meet – as in I have a “curriculum” of romance that I “unleash” to every new woman I meet.
· I buy so many flowers that the sincerity of them is gone and it diminishes its meaning to the point of expectedness.
· I am so romantic that the romance no longer is special – it’s expected and all encompassing – and eventually becomes all I talk about.
· I apologize too much – in other words – I apologize for “everything.”

After hearing that, I began to think – and realized that while most of those statements may be true – that should be my biggest problem.

So I am being crucified and broken up with because I am too nice? I am wrong for trying to push the romantic envelope? I am single because I am overly “mushy?” Yet, guys who are abusive, controlling – and downright nasty to women are in relationships?

Are you as half as confused as I am?

In no way am I saying that I am the best man in the world. But what I can say with confidence is that I would treat a woman a Hell of a lot better than most of these “upstanding gentlemen” that grace our fine planet. I would never hurt a woman physically or mentally. I would never call her names, punch her, make her cry – or try and control her life. If anything – I feel that a relationship is a partnership – and that both people involved should help fulfill each other’s dreams…

…but despite that – I am single.

So if that is how it is – and that is how it is going to be – then I am done with dating. I will no longer reach for the unreachable. I will stay the course of my life and pursue my professional dreams without the distraction of temporary and masked romance, which would only deter me from my future goals anyway.

For the women out there, enjoy what you have to work with. For the men out there – good luck – you’re gonna need it.