When I was 27, I met a woman named Sandy who I dated for almost two years. When we were together, we were very much in love. We enjoyed each other’s company, we had some really amazing times together – and most importantly – we were as good of friends as we were lovers. The only reason we are no longer together is because she wanted a family and I didn’t. But despite the fact that we are no longer together, we still speak to each other on occasion – and I am happy to report that she is now a very proud mother of Ryan – a beautiful baby boy.

Two weeks ago, she moved to California. For a while now, she was telling me that she wanted out of New York, and to be honest – I don’t blame her. It is really hard to live in this City – especially if you have a child. In order to give Ryan everything he needs – she was spending hundreds of dollars a month on daycare – almost as much as her rent. I only have myself and Beavis to support – so I can only imagine the financial strain it is to raise a child in New York City.

Thankfully, Sandy works for the U.S. Postal Service, so she was able to obtain a transfer to California, so she can keep the same job and benefits that she had here. Also, she has some friends out there that will help her get situated as quickly as possible. It isn’t easy to uproot your entire life and move somewhere else – especially with a child – so I give her an enormous amount of credit for being able to make such a life-altering transition.

Although it was my decision to end the relationship I had with Sandy, a part of me will always love her. Other than the fact that I did not want to have a baby, she was everything I wanted in a woman. I will confess that if I stayed with Sandy and did decide to have a child with her – I am certain we would have lived a very happy life together. The day she moved out of the apartment we got together was a day that I spent crying like a baby because we were officially going our separate ways. And both of us have told each other since we went our separate ways that we still love each other and wish that we could have worked things out. But despite the fact that we will never be together again – I will always be her friend – and will always be there for her in any way I can should she ever need me.

Sandy, I wish you and Ryan the best life that California and this world has to offer. You are an amazing person with a heart of gold that will raise that boy to be a man amongst men. He is very lucky to have you as his mother – and should you ever require anything – you know where to find me.

Good luck Sandy. Have a wonderful life.