Despite the fact that it has been three years since the events of September 11, 2001, my tears and my sorrow are just as strong if not stronger this morning than they were that fateful day 1,095 days ago. And when the ceremony was to begin this morning at 8:30am, I almost didn’t watch it – because I felt it would be even harder to watch it alone in Doug’s apartment without actually being there at the site of the tragedy…

...and then the phone calls started.

From my friend Jenna who called me at 8:29am to make sure that I was awake for the ceremony, to Deborah, one of my best friends who woke up at 5:30am her time and called me so I would not have to be alone at 8:46am – the moment that the first plane hit and we lost Doug – to my mother and my friends Ralph, Lisa, Mek who also called to check up on me – to the beautiful card I received from my friend America that said nothing but, “Vive La Doug” – I never felt more loved and cared for in my entire life.

If I live to be 100-years-old, the “anniversary” of that tragic Tuesday will cut me as deeply each passing year as it did the day of the event itself. Each time I see family members reading names of the 2,749 people who were killed at the site of the World Trade Center while thousands of other family members stand by wiping their tears and holding pictures of their mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, husbands, wives – and best friends, I can’t help but feel all the pain and grief that each and every one of them are feeling.

Losing Doug that day was extremely hard on me, but I cannot imagine how difficult it must have been for his wife Amy, his brothers Rick and Greg – or his mother Carol – who at this morning’s ceremony – stood in front of the entire world with beauty, strength and grace and read a selection of names of those we lost that day, ending her reading by saying, “and my amazing son, Douglas Farnum.” It was hard enough to hear his name called at the site where he lost his life on the “anniversary” of his passing, but to hear his name spoken by his own mother was very moving yet extremely painful. I remember visiting his mother in the days following his loss and seeing her trying her best to be strong in front of all of us – while inside feeling incalculable pain and sorrow.

And just like everyone was there for Mrs. Farnum after we lost Doug, I was amazed to see how many people were there for me so far this morning. All night last night, I was very upset that I was not able to be at this morning’s ceremony to help my City get through the memorial service a little easier, and although it still hurts that I was not able to do my part – I am very touched that so many of those close to me were there to help me get through it this time – and for that I will be forever grateful.

Friendship is truly an amazing thing, It transcends age, race, religion and even distance. It bonds people who either live in the same neighborhood and see each other every day, or live thousands of miles apart from one another and have met only a handful of times. It can build bridges across continents, turn complete strangers into life-long companions – and make getting through a very painful ceremony a little easier.

To everyone this morning who, either by voice or by e-mail, offered me support, remembered Doug, told me to be strong – and let me cry – thank you – thank you so much.